Ubud - The Heart of Bali

We ended up spending 6 days in Kuta, Bali. Afterwards, was our last stop in Bali, Ubud. It was hard to leave the air-conditioning, refreshing pool, beautiful beach, and great surf. Also, our lovely Swedish friends Emily and Daniel whom we had met in Padang Bai, and traveled to Lombok with were heading into Kuta, and we thought it would be great to see them again!

However, by the time we left, we. were. done. with. Kuta.

Where do I start?

How about the grime.

Kuta Bali, sadly, is pretty gross. Despite the local custom of heavily watering the sidewalk and street in front of their shops, the streets, and sidewalks, are gross. The dirt/road grime is literally inches deep many places. Since at any given time of day, regardless of weather, you are likely alternating between water and dirt, the end result is mud. Lots of it. Flip-flops (or thongs, as the Aussies would call them) are standard footwear here. They are really necessary, and other type of shoe would certainly become destroyed within mere moments. The result however is a thing a clinging layer of greasy road mud firmly attached to your feet.

Then there is the crowding.

A typical street in Kuta is roughly what we would in the western world consider an alley. It is (if you're lucky) one-lane wide, and only on main thorough-fares will you find anything resembling a sidewalk. This one lane road contains cars, trucks, and vans moving in both directions. Additionally, the hugely popular motor-bike, as everywhere in Bali, rapidly and perilously weaves in both directions to the left, right, and in-between the larger vehicles. Being as this is a single-lane alley, when anything larger than a car meets going in opposite directions, someone must inevitably reverse the nearest intersection or driveway. This, in turn, creates massive traffic jams. Complicating this entire mess are the pedestrians, and plenty of them. Now, the twist. Along each "road", typically on both sides and without separation, are the vendors. They usual suspects are small tourist shops hawking their wares, warungs enticing you with their menu, and spas pushing massages.

Did I mention the smell?

Unlike some of the smaller towns, Kuta (in most places) does not have open sewers running along the side of the road. Since open sewers were (and many places still are) the standard all around Bali for quite some time, as the larger areas became developed with the onset of western tourism a solution needed devising. There simply wasn't space for all these people, cars and mopeds, and the open sewers are well, gross. As I previously mentioned the streets contained exactly no room for adding sidewalks, so in all their wisdom a raised sidewalk was placed over the top of the open sewer. These are tiled with concrete slabs roughly 2 feet long, and 3 feet wide. Many are broken, teetering, crumbling, uneven, missing entirely, etc. The end result certainly does nothing to contain the smell, very little to add to pedestrian space (the aforementioned vendors have taken this space over) and nothing to increase safety. (Constant vigilance is required to avoid falling into the sewer or road, or otherwise killing yourself)

Finally, the cacophony of sound...

All those vehicles, especially the mopeds with varying levels of non-existent exhaust muffling, add up to quite a lot of sound pollution. Now lets layer on some audible excess. Each of the tourist shops, loudly (and sometimes physically) try to get your attention into their store. (lets be clear, by store I generally refer to an open-walled section of the street where they have set up their crap) It may be their limited knowledge of English, or just a somewhat shocking lack of originality, but each one seems to grab onto something about you, and ties it into their merchandise, and tries to attract you with it. For example: Krissy has some pink knock-off sunglasses she got in the Gilis. A very popular cry as we walked down the street would be "Yes! Pink sunglasses!! For you very cheap price." another example would be that I wear a hat. So our walks were often accompanied by "Yes, hats! Cheap price!!". The spas, while just as persistent were even less original "Yes, massage?". The warungs and restaurants were sometimes less aggressive, but equally as loud and attentive. "Hello, menu?" "Yes, cheap food. Very cheap price!". The other thing you will hear at least once every 10 feet, is "Yes, transport?". This is generally the remaining people, who seem to have nothing to sell but do own a moped, and are always willing to rent it out, or give a ride... for a price. And finally, the coup-de-grace - Taxi drives in Kuta have a lovely habit of  honking at you as they drive by, just to let you know that there is a ride available to you! Generous, if not for the fact that the result of this is a honk from right over your should roughly every 13 seconds. Did I mention the "Yes, transport?" dudes? All told, the end result over any 100 foot stretch of street is: 200 vehicles, 25 honks, 15 unoriginal sales pitches, 10 unwanted menus, and 5 "Yes, massage?"s.

Oh yeah, this was supposed to be about Ubud. Well, I guess I got a bit distracted trying to paint the picture of how lovely Kuta was...